I'm really lucky

I'm really lucky to have the wife I have. I've been married 9 years now (our anniversary was on Wednesday). I've known her for 18 years total. Even when I act like a complete ass, she still finds it in her to love me, so I must have done something right somewhere along the line.

Lynn deals with a lot being the stay at home mom. One of the bigger things I would think would be boredom, since we only have a single vehicle, since I need it to get back and forth from work, she's at home a lot.

Perhaps I've gotten to used to that, and take her for granted for the things she does for me and the family. I'm generally a lazy person, and I may have allowed that to get into my feelings for how I perceive my wife.. Maybe - I don't know. It's not like I'd ever cheat on her or something along those lines. It's more my general laziness keeping me from saying thank you, helping out more than I probably can, etc. I'm not a complete loaf, but I could probably do better than I do. As I'm sure most people could.

But I feel bad today after I had an epiphany in thinking about our relationship. Slowly, over time, I may have allowed myself to become something I never wanted to be. A bad husband at times. I'm sure Lynn would say I'm not a bad husband, and I don't think I am as a rule, but certain individual small things that I do probably aren't good, and need work. I need to do better.

Who am I writing this to? No one in particular. This entire thing here is just a thinking out loud exercise, I think.